MAID

This article profiles a woman who wants medically assisted death for mental health reasons. I never seriously considered suicide myself because of the impact on my loved ones, but there were absolutely entire decades when I did not want to be alive, so I sure hear where she's coming from. My depression eventually lifted due to hormonal changes and a more peaceful living situation, but even if I could have known that would happen, for many people it would still not necessarily be worth suffering through the bad years.

My state is expected to pass a Medical Assistance in Dying law this year. It will not include provisions for people with chronic illness as Canada's does, but I won't be surprised if they come later. I think that respecting people's rights to make their own medical decisions is the compassionate and ethical choice, and support these laws. But two things: first, as the article discusses, mental health conditions introduce more complicated ethical choices. Second, particularly for people with chronic illnesses, lack of resources is a huge factor in quality of life. I am in a relatively GOOD position in comparison with others with chronic illnesses, yet pretty much have no life outside of work. But if I didn't have to work, had housekeeping help, and could get a daily massage? I'd be able to do a lot more things that are important to me. For people with less income, worse work or living situations, more physical limitations, and more pain, the social choice not to support them is effectively driving them to suicide. And frustrating as slippery-slope arguments are, they can also be true.

he wants no part of my diet

The dog was following me around hopefully while I was getting a snack but then he saw my snack was steamed broccoli and he ate kibble instead.

ah, to live in a civilized country

My independent pharmacy sells its own gift cards. My initial thought was "it's so sad that health care is something people would be excited about opening on Christmas morning." Then I realized I would in fact be psyched if I didn't have to pay for a few months of compounded testosterone, so yeah... 

still managing joint custody of our youngest

I was looking forward to my daughter's graduation in part because it would reduce contact with my ex when that shared financial responsibility ended. (2025 should be the last year we need to figure out how to split dependent income tax benefits, and it's likely she made enough money so neither of us will claim her- very bad for my tax bill but great for her.) Ironically our shared dog is now requiring more contact and discussion than the kids have in years (and is expected to cost about the same in vet bills as college tuition did, which has already led to disagreement). But I still hope he stays with us for a good long time, despite the heart murmur and arthritis that's slowing him down. 

watch the icy patch

Update: I finally found a good Christmas watch: a 1987 Muppets special, in which everyone visits Fozzie's mom. I'd never seen it and it far exceeded expectations. The Sesame Street and Fraggle Rock gangs show up. Big Bird helps the Swedish Chef feel his feelings. Bert and Ernie have a small talk technique I wish I could utilize. Miss Piggy is not present for most of it, which always improves the dynamic. Rolf meets another dog. When a turkey tries to seduce Camilla away from Gonzo, Gonzo quotes "Some Like it Hot."

I even missed the Family Ties finale!

In 2021 HBO aired the first six episodes of a show called The Nevers. However, it was created by Joss Whedon, and after he was cancelled they never aired the last six. I was curious about them but even pirating proved difficult, so I asked my kid to do it for me. He wasn't able to download or find them on demand either, but alerted me that they were airing on Tubi the week before Christmas, so I checked them out. 

The show was a mess. But mostly it was funny to me that this thing that was normal when I was a kid, only being able to watch something at the one specific time it was on and without being able to pause it, felt so alien. How did we ever fit that into our lives? (I was only half watching while sending work emails, taking care of the dog, etc.) I remember it was exciting when we could program the VCR, but even that was a late development at my house and not used very often. 

(Yes, I know there are ways to screen record to get around that, but I just can't be bothered. I also can't usually be bothered to pirate media. Honestly since legal streaming became even more annoying than pirating, I just watch less. Maybe when I'm unemployed I'll start futzing around with VPNs and such, but now, nah.)

I mean give us some benefit of letting you track us all the time

Google is getting rid of location reminders, which pinged me when I was in certain places to tell me to do other stuff while I was there. It's not a massive loss (probably the one I used most often was the one suggesting I go to Empire Wine while I was at Target, and I'm never there these days anyway) but it feels like a function which should be standard.

important reddit news

There is a "what is my cookie cutter" subreddit. It reminds me of early aughts internet; Russian bots do not benefit from participating so it's mostly actual humans being silly and/or helpful. 

movies

 Partner A and I have not had any luck attempting to watch Christmas movies this year. The first 15 minutes or so of Jingle Bell Heist were so bad we gave up. Anna and the Apocalypse was also bad, but at least it was in an intentional sort of way I guess? Not my genre in any case. The Apartment wasn't really a Christmas movie (despite having the most epic office Christmas party I've ever seen) and the romantic interest was so uncompelling that it was hard to muster any interest in the plot. (Plenty of casual 1960s racism though!) True to its name, White Christmas only had white characters so the racism was systemic rather than overt (though the sadness over the end of minstrel shows... well). It was generally meh but slightly more interesting because I'm never sure with old movies what was supposed to be gay coded and what wasn't. Was everyone supposed to be straight and what appears in 2025 to be a queer storyline misleading because dancing men usually look gay now? Or did the audience at the time also read between the lines?

graduation

My daughter graduated from college early! I gave her a sword and a trip to the Atlanta Aquarium and she was thrilled with both (which was nice because I often miss the mark with her these days). I'm excited for whatever comes next for her, but feel bad that she's graduating into a terrible job market. She has an apartment with partners/friends (I can't keep up) in Buffalo and will be looking for work there after Christmas.

Her first semester there, she got an A minus in a 2-credit class. I foolishly said something like, "Oh good; now there's no chance of you having to worry about keeping a 4.0. That made it so I didn't take as many risks as I should have in college." Weeeellll she was determined to get back that 4.0, got all As throughout, and RETOOK that class this semester.

And ended up getting an unexpected A- in a different class. It doesn't matter even a little bit, but it does matter to her, so I feel terrible for her. 

these dreams...

In the past few months I've been having occasional graphically violent nightmares. Like, seeing dozens of people including my mom getting gunned down in a war zone sort of thing. A lot of male partners have talked about dreams like this, but I don't recall EVER having them before. Not a fan!

no good choices

"Where exactly in this schedule am I supposed to see friends? Go to social gatherings? Maintain relationships? Have a life? The answer is: I don’t."

important dog content

 Detail I enjoyed in this article about a guy who stole vast amounts of art and jewelry from rich people in the 80s: his team was able to handle guard dogs by giving them scritches and food from the refrigerator.

hungry hungry hungry

Years ago, gaining weight significantly reduced my low dizziness and vertigo. They're increasing again since I lost weight (not terribly surprising, but my blood pressure is a little higher now and I thought that would help). Bringing my BMI above 25 is probably necessary. Whether that will also allow me to not feel hungry all the time and to stop having constant dreams about food, as I have been since May, remains unknown. 

young adult drama

My son is coming back for ten days over Christmas, and bringing along a very new girlfriend. Their relationship is moving extremely quickly (like, I won't be surprised if they announce their engagement) and there are a number of other red flags (even ignoring her right wing Christian beliefs, since he shares them). I expect this to be a very challenging visit. It's always tough to stand up for my daughter and for my own beliefs when he's here without every interaction being an argument, and I think we have to play extra nice in front of the girlfriend or we risk being cut off. (Not that he has threatened anything like that, but they are on track to get married, and that's a time when he could be easily pressured to do that.)

trains

In the past 15 years I have spent a well above average amount of time listening to various people in my bed talk about trains. One of them was going on about a Chinese 600 km/hr train, and my contribution was something like, "And here the best we've got is what, the Acela line? What does it top out at?" 

Now here's the real evidence that I have a type: when he didn't happen to know that train fact offhand, I was shocked.