sports bras a lie?

As previously mentioned, fallout from a biopsy has meant I've been forced to wear bras for several months. I still find them deeply uncomfortable and a new frustration has arisen: because I am stuck wearing them all the time, the ligaments in my UNINJURED breast have weakened, and gets sore when I'm not wearing one (post-shower for example). I'd never choose breast surgery, but if I could have them painlessly removed I would.

This woman theorizes that sports bras are a lie. I can't say that's been my experience. Even as someone who's normally gone braless, running without a bra or in a minimally supportive bra has always been uncomfortable. Her hypothesis (and she includes some calculations regarding the movement of non-Newtonian fluids). Her theory is that most bras transfer what would be side-to-side movement to up-and-down, which is more uncomfortable. I'm glad it works for her, but I'm stuck with squishing them flat.

though she did not in fact study the blade

 Just ordered a sword for my daughter's graduation, as one does.

moms and witches

In an accident of when library reserves came in, I simultaneously read two books about complicated mother/daughter relationships and witchcraft. The Women Could Fly also had themes related to living in an oppressive society and the complications of deciding whether or not to flee. Lessons in Magic and Disaster was more about grief, making amends, and 18th century literature. (It was a messier book overall which tried to do too many things; fine but I preferred "The Women Could Fly.")

trees to make you happy

 * Check out this most excellent tree, grown to accommodate a dance hall! Maybe I should visit Europe after all, to get the eye drops I need AND to visit it.

 

every week at work there is a new boring disaster

Quote of the day from my boss: "I know people are afraid of you but that's a good thing." Work remains a disaster, and due to unexpected funding withdrawals and colleagues wisely fleeing for greener pastures, it appears that much of my job is now going to be trying to get spacy and inexperienced programmers to do their jobs. Extra hard mode: I am not a programmer and can't reasonably check their work, determine whether what they're doing makes sense, or set informed timelines. Yippeeeee...

ANY bra is bad enough, and now...

Two months after the breast biopsy, I'm still in quite a lot of pain, and so was forced to finally accept I need high-support sports bras just for walking the dog. The ones I had for running back in the day are long gone so I had to buy new ones, with zippers or massive five-hook straps to... restrain things. Getting them on is a struggle for my arthritic hands because it requires both pulling things tight (hard enough!) and manipulating fussy things; I can't use pullover ones because my torn rotator cuff doesn't allow it. My dog agrees with me that it's completely ridiculous, as he waits impatiently.

The whole experience has made me dread next year's mammogram. The biopsy's near and long term side effects have made me very hesitant to get one unless something shows up on the mammogram which is TRULY concerning, but I don't have the knowledge I need to make that assessment (and don't think my doctor will help).

prescription drug savings tip!

Tears are bad for my already-compromised eyes, so I try to time crying for one of the four times a day when it's time to reapply the wildly expensive eye drops I'm not allowed to refill frequently enough. "Last chance," I told myself at 7pm on the birthday of the baby I lost, and curled up in fetal position for a while, crying less for the baby than for young me, who was trying so hard while hurting so much.

Another way the healthcare system is bullshit

 The end of this article notes that while giving injured people blood as soon as possible saves lives, we don't have it in ambulances because insurance won't pay for it. 

They probably assign classier venues than I'd choose

A new dating app just tells you when and where to show up for a date, instead of allowing conversation on the app. On the one hand it does get rid of people who don't actually want to meet up (either at all or anytime soon). However, even if profiles are more extensive than they are on swipe apps, a short chat can go a long way in determining compatibility. 

(The article also goes on for a while about the "new" innovation of matching people with friends of friends to allow for vetting and to encourage good behavior. First, this was Hinge's whole thing like ten years ago; second, Tinder only stopped showing mutual contacts a few years back.)

Lilith Fair

A bunch of my friends saw the Indigo Girls recently. I skipped it because the venue's poor management of a Hozier concert I attended made me never want to give them money again, but it was a fun reminder of when I saw them at the 1998 Lilith Fair. I think that was the best festival I've ever attended. The lineup was fantastic, the other attendees were chill, the venue provided plenty of space where everyone could see, my body at the time let me comfortably sit on the ground so I could move around to different stages without needing to think about chairs, I was with a partner and a bunch of friends. Now the closest I get to that is a local jazz festival. It's not my favorite genre, but I can plop down a chair in the shade and just hang out all day, people watching and absorbing the vibe.